Thou Shalt Not  

Posted by Heidi in

Y'all know I was just kidding yesterday, right? RIGHT! RIGHT!?!

I'm a good one for saying what everyone wants to say but is afraid to/has more sense than to/wouldn't dream of say/saying. But I was WRONG, so very very wrong, to say what I said as a dear sweet reader of my blog let me know. So, just so you all know, the rules are Thou Shalt Not Click On Ads Unless You Are Truly Interested In What They Are Selling. Period. (sorry for making some of you sinners)

So, have a great weekend! And just know that I was awoken today by a voice that said, "Good morning, Madam. The latest issue of Vogue features your exceptional beauty, charm, style and personal taste. It might be necessary to use the back entrance so as to avoid the hordes of admirers waiting at the front door." More on that later.

It's going to be a great year!

P.S. The neighbor's dog has been strangely silent since night before last when The Spouse went and rang the doorbell, peered through the windows and pounded on the back fence. I think a few thrown pebbles were also involved but that is not an official statement of any kind. What does it all mean? Weird.

This entry was posted on Saturday, January 3, 2009 at Saturday, January 03, 2009 and is filed under . You can follow any responses to this entry through the comments feed .

26 wise, witty and wonderful comments

I knew you were kidding and curious at the same time. And I think that's just fine. I love when you goof off and I think most people do understand that. I find it endearing and I'm sorry if you felt bad about your post. I'm sure you meant no disrespect or error, but simply to jest.

Have a good weekend, lady.

January 3, 2009 at 11:01 AM

Heather, you're such a doll!!! Thank you.

January 3, 2009 at 11:09 AM

The whole dog thing reminds me of that Seinfeld episode where Elaine is about to go loony over a dog barking at night and pays Newman to off it. Maybe another neighbor did something like that . . .

January 3, 2009 at 11:45 AM

"strangely silent"? hmmm Maybe someone slipped it a bitter pill. Anyway, you couldn't me if you tried. Have a terrific weekend!

January 3, 2009 at 12:19 PM

Amusingly enough, the baby is screaming "BARNEY MOM BARNEY MOM!" so excuse me while I go click on the Barney ad. :)

January 3, 2009 at 12:34 PM

Aloha Miss Heidi. You best be careful now lest you get yourself in trouble. You should never break commandments and then blog about it. Hee hee.

Verifier says kreeder. Hmmm you are a breeder of krabbiness. But it's such deliciously kute krabbiness.

So what's this about Vogue beating down your door? No wonder you need your beauty sleep!

January 3, 2009 at 12:36 PM

verifier says yabstie now.

You are such a yabstie too. Yabstie, Yabstie, Yabstie. That's all you do anymore.

January 3, 2009 at 12:37 PM

Meh, I thought you were funny yesterday!
As for the strangely silent dog, perhaps someone has taken pity on the poor thing and offered it some food and shelter?
OR...
Maybe it ran away after hearing strange rumors about odd tasting food...?
Have a good weekend!

January 3, 2009 at 12:56 PM

You couldn't OFFEND me if you tried, I meant. ugh

January 3, 2009 at 1:24 PM

Annette, that ep was hysterical! I keep telling myself it's just a dog--that's barking it's head off--and to just ignore it but it can be like Chinese water torture (or so I assume). Kazzy, yes, a bitter pill! Love that! I didn't, though. Neither did The Spouse. Honest. Jami, well, in that case, it is clearly all above board. I am so glad my kids are all too old for Barney, though. He was fine the first couple of years but the Big Guy just kept on a going and a going with the Barney. Aaaiii! Crash, I blogged about breaking the commandment so my repentance had to be public so I reserve the right to be a yabstie about it (I deleted the orig. post--you might have missed it). Abra, thank you! That is always the goal. When you come from a home where your father holds a plastic bag over your head to amuse your mother who is standing by the running disposal and is deaf besides so she does not hear your father's admonitions to "look--look!", you kind of grow up thinking it is okay to go out on a limb as long as it is FUNNY! (okay, so he only did that once and it was mostly b/c I was generally a pill pretty much all the time for a couple of years and boy were my parents glad I got married and moved out of the house!)

January 3, 2009 at 1:25 PM

Kazzy, thanks, I was wondering. I figured it was my fault that I didn't get it but kinda glad to find out my brain isn't as feeble as I assumed.

January 3, 2009 at 1:26 PM

cant wait to hear about the rest of the Vogue issue and I am totally cracking up over the dog... hum...... we did say poison is a no no, right?

thou shalt not....

January 3, 2009 at 2:07 PM

Well, good thing it's the sabbath tomorrow. I can repent for being a dishonest person. Think I can repent for you as well, since you know, you made me a dishonest person?

January 3, 2009 at 3:22 PM

hahahahaha!!! I bet your neighbor follows your blog!! hahahahaha....and they know you may document barking episodes/poison/shoot with BB gun/shoot with paintball gun or none or all of the above to their dog!!! ROTFLOL!!!!!

BTW.....I asked a few bookstores about your book today. I asked why they weren't carrying it! Don't you know who she is? I asked? (at Deseret book) They assured me that your book might be in the next shipment or two. We'll see! I also checked at Barnes and Noble....they said they could order it for me. I told them I could order it from Amazon thank you very much! I want them to feel like they are missing out on something. Now I am going to have my friends go in and ask for it too!

PS-I am ordering my copy today!

January 3, 2009 at 3:28 PM

My husband probably took care of that dog for you. He has his ways :)

January 3, 2009 at 3:55 PM

Maybe someone left a muzzle on their front porch.

Can't wait to hear the Vogue story. Are you on the cover?!?

January 3, 2009 at 4:30 PM

Stacey, I fear I have mislead people about Vogue. I will have to explain one of these days . . .Kristina, I am going to have to do extra repenting for leading you all into sin, in fact, you are probably completely off the hook, April, see long winded email about why you won't find my books in most book stores, Becky, if he did, give him a big kiss and hug for me! Erin, sadly no, well, actually, that is a good thing, I'm feeling esp old and gray today, but, well, see comment to Stacey.

January 3, 2009 at 6:10 PM

Nicely done with the dog. But I think I would have gone with the poison.

What happened to yesterday's post?

January 3, 2009 at 7:27 PM

As long as you are repentant with the ads thing, I guess. Who knew? You have educated all of us. I'll still look at them (which I never do) to see if I'm actually interested enough to click. How's that?

Curious about Vogue...

January 3, 2009 at 8:20 PM

Alison, thanks! I deleted yesterday's post lest there be evidence of my wrong doing. Lara, that is a very nice compromise! Thanks! (The Vogue thing--yah--I fear I have sinned yet again . . .)

January 3, 2009 at 9:09 PM

I knew you were kidding, and I thought it was an adorable post! Since I was gone and had extremely limited computer time, I couldn't come back and read more comments.

Now I want to know who said what to you about it. Unless it was me, and then I'll go hang my head because I would have not wanted to make you feel sad. Please say it wasn't me! I can't check because the post is gone. :( Well, unless I'm such a dunce that I can't find it. Entirely possible.

January 3, 2009 at 10:15 PM

Ok, I just saw that you deleted it.

And I think I know what happened to the dog. He can read.

He slipped into the house and read your blog comments. He got so scared at the possibilities waiting for him that it made him mute. Problem solved.

January 3, 2009 at 10:17 PM

I love that you deleted the "questionable" post for fear of leaving any evidence behind. I have done the same thing after having written a post that caused a bit of commotion on our site.

In other news, I was very glad to read that your neighbor's dog has given you not one, but two, nights of peaceful sleep. Strategically thrown pebbles may not be a bad thing! Just a means to an end.

-Francesca

January 4, 2009 at 5:55 AM

No, Rebecca, it wasn't you, but the person who said it was right. I'm glad you thought my post was adorable, though! Adorable sounds so much better than illicit, sinister, criminal or villianous. I love the idea that the dog next door can read. Maybe The Spouse didn't throw pebbles--maybe he broke in, turned on the computer and directed the screen featuring my blog out the sliding glass door for Fido to see. There's an idea! Francesca, yes and now it is three whole nights, the best I have had in over two weeks. Sooooooo wonderful! Happy New Year to me!

January 4, 2009 at 7:18 AM

About the dog barking...I am married to a vet, and he can de-bark a dog. LOL

January 5, 2009 at 6:04 AM

Okay, Jewel, but when can he be here? (tee hee)

January 5, 2009 at 10:19 AM

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