It’s just that the internal monologue is so much louder.
And interesting.
And pertinent. To me and what I think is important and that’s what counts.
Right?
That’s what I thought.
And that’s about all I have to say today b/c of the serious injury to my “d-e” finger—no, that is not code for some nasty word! It’s the finger that types the d’s and the e’s! I use it. A lot. It started as a hot glue gun burn, then it was a water blister the size of Montana, then it burst all over the keyboard on Tuesday whilst writing chapter one of the book I am currently calling NEW BOOK, then it became this incredibly grotesque thing you really don’t want me to explain.
Do you think this is some kind of cosmic force trying to prevent me from my resolution of novel-writing on Tuesdays?
Do you think this is somehow Crash’s doing?
Do you think that Crash is some kind of cosmic force?
So much to think about.
Meanwhile, since I need to rest my finger so it will be all gung-ho on Tuesday for chapter two of NEW BOOK (sort of like New Moon, but not even remotely) I am going to stop now and give you an oldie but goodie I haven’t rerun in many a moon.
And for those who are really new here, esp. Shelle from Blokthoughts since I know she loves posts about things that go poop in the stall, go HERE.
If you want to see my book cover finally and partially shown on the Avalon Books website, go HERE.
If you want to read what Sue of the Quack Shack says about Miss D. go HERE
And if you want to read what other bloggers have said about it—see my sidebar.
Oh, and whilst you are there, see that lovely poll in sidebar A? Please vote if you have a mind to. As for the mindless, the support group is at my house on Wednesday mornings.
Emerge from blogging (if you can) long enough to remember that it is Tuesday.
Tuesday is the day the Big Guy bowls with the Special Olympics. Note that he really needs a haircut.
Note that he needs to have his hair washed before you cut it or else the shears will simply slip and slide off of the so shiny shafts of hair.
Go into the bathroom to run the water. Note that there is a soaking wet beach towel in the tub.
Remove the towel whilst noting that it is huge. Proceed to wring it out four times. Note how your arms ache.
Proceed to run the water. Note that the tub is so filthy that no one, even the Big Guy, can hope to come out cleaner than when he went in.
Tuesday is the day the Big Guy bowls with the Special Olympics. Note that he really needs a haircut.
Note that he needs to have his hair washed before you cut it or else the shears will simply slip and slide off of the so shiny shafts of hair.
Go into the bathroom to run the water. Note that there is a soaking wet beach towel in the tub.
Remove the towel whilst noting that it is huge. Proceed to wring it out four times. Note how your arms ache.
Proceed to run the water. Note that the tub is so filthy that no one, even the Big Guy, can hope to come out cleaner than when he went in.
Clean the tub. Run the water. Instruct Big Guy to immerse.
Help the Big Guy wash his hair and search for clothes for him to wear. Note there are none for public consumption (there are some that are ripped and holey which he wears around the house but those won’t bowl well).
Gather the dirty clothes and throw them in the washer. Note that the laundry soap is almost gone and the money is almost gone but so is the month so there is hope. Help the Big Guy get dressed in the interim (i.e. holey) clothes and drag out the hair cutting paraphernalia.
Put that plastic thingy (you know, that thingy hairdressers use when they cut hair) around his neck. Note that his neck is finally bigger than the circumference of the plastic thingy.
Cut his hair. Note that he has a gorgeous head of hair. Note what a waste.
Finish cutting then remove from his shirt all the hair that circumvented the plastic thingy (due to its failure to close correctly over his large bull-sized neck). Note that it is somehow more hair than he has left on his head. Note that he was long overdue for a haircut.
Once he is gone, get out the broom and dustpan and sweep up the mess. As you dump the hair, note that it is enough to stuff a pillow, the large over-stuffed kind just begging you to sink into it with a book and a cup of hot chocolate.
Help the Big Guy wash his hair and search for clothes for him to wear. Note there are none for public consumption (there are some that are ripped and holey which he wears around the house but those won’t bowl well).
Gather the dirty clothes and throw them in the washer. Note that the laundry soap is almost gone and the money is almost gone but so is the month so there is hope. Help the Big Guy get dressed in the interim (i.e. holey) clothes and drag out the hair cutting paraphernalia.
Put that plastic thingy (you know, that thingy hairdressers use when they cut hair) around his neck. Note that his neck is finally bigger than the circumference of the plastic thingy.
Cut his hair. Note that he has a gorgeous head of hair. Note what a waste.
Finish cutting then remove from his shirt all the hair that circumvented the plastic thingy (due to its failure to close correctly over his large bull-sized neck). Note that it is somehow more hair than he has left on his head. Note that he was long overdue for a haircut.
Once he is gone, get out the broom and dustpan and sweep up the mess. As you dump the hair, note that it is enough to stuff a pillow, the large over-stuffed kind just begging you to sink into it with a book and a cup of hot chocolate.
Wake yourself up from your daydream only to note that you accidentally poured about a gallon of cut hair in the recycling bin. Note that it is already hopelessly mixed with the other occupants of the bin.
Note that you really ought to google “hair” to find out if it is recyclable.
Note that you have just enough time to make and drink a cup of hot chocolate whilst reading before it is time to start the afternoon round of taxi driving OR deal with the hair situation.
Grab a pan to start heating the milk for your chocolate (or, on a really good day, half and half). Note that you are a really bad citizen of the planet.
Note how you just can’t bring yourself to care.
Note that you really ought to google “hair” to find out if it is recyclable.
Note that you have just enough time to make and drink a cup of hot chocolate whilst reading before it is time to start the afternoon round of taxi driving OR deal with the hair situation.
Grab a pan to start heating the milk for your chocolate (or, on a really good day, half and half). Note that you are a really bad citizen of the planet.
Note how you just can’t bring yourself to care.
Contributors
- Heidi
- Wife, mother, novelist, gardener, bloggist, lover of good books, roses and vintage charm; passionate about her family, words, roses, vintage home decor, found treasures and the color pink.
Books of Which Even Jane Would Approve
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Part of the Power of the Matchmaker series
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A Midwinter Ball
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O'er the River Liffey
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Every Hope
a Triple Treat Romance
Which Jane Austen Heroine Are You?
The Scandal in Honor
Book Two in The Lord Trevelin Mysteries
The Devil in Beauty
The Lord Trevelin Mysteries
A RONE Award Finalist
Miss Armistead Makes Her Choice
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Crowned Heart Recipient
A RONE Award Finalist!
The Lord Who Sneered and Other Tales
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A Miss Delacourt Adventure
My Novel
Miss Delacourt Speaks Her Mind (Book 1)
The Sequel
Miss Delacourt Has Her Day (Book 2)
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A Miss Delacourt Adventure #3
It Happened Twelfth Night
my anthology novella
The Large Print Version
My heroine-Ginny Delacourt
by Audrey Eclectic
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