All The Reasons I'm Not Blogging  

Posted by Heidi in





A. Because of my unpredictable life, I have a fear of commitment.

B. I tend to get addicted to things. (Maybe “obsessed” is a better word though I do try to only obsess over things that are really positive. That’s not working out for me since I can’t seem to choose my obsessions.) (Not that blogging is bad! Au contraire! But it IS time consuming.)

C. A+B=high anxiety. (Since there’s nothing that commits you like an addiction, blogging--to which I am highly addicted--is causing me severe anxiety.)

D. I don't like panic attacks. (I have to say, this is really bugging me. Ask my husband. He knows. Because I talk to him about it, ad nauseum. Usually I don't mention it until the drool is about to hit the pillow so he is less than empathetic when I say things like: "I don't know what is happening in their lives!" or "I'm afraid they're going to think I don't care!" or "What if they stop being my friend?" or, when I'm feeling super self-absorbed (which, let's face it, is most of the time) "What if they never visit MY blog again?" which would be totally natural and understandable and has, by the way, happened. A lot.

E. It is amazing how much you can get done when you don't blog. (I have crossed off every single thing on my to-do list every single day this week. It feels good!) (Also, I have cooked almost every night since school started at the end of August. That doesn't feel so good but my skinny-stick-children are slowly putting on some much needed flesh.) (Oddly, enough, the Big Guy weighs roughly the same. A lot.)

F. I have been spending some of my usual blogging time helping out with the wonderful site, Mormon Women: Who We Are, and loving it! A lot.

G. Christmas is coming. (I have no idea how I blogged to the extent I did last December and still managed to put up a tree and shop for presents.) (Oh, yeah . . .I didn't cook. Or clean. Or bathe.)

Things that have nothing to do with why I'm not blogging: your wonderful comments. More than a few people have been rather surprised when they learned how low my actual hit count is because I get so many comments. That's because I have managed to surround myself with truly warm and wonderful people out here in Blogdania. I cherish all of your comments but those you have left on the last two posts of mine have been extra special. Thank you so much from the bottom of my heart!

Lastly, because I'm such a glutton for punishment, I listed a large print copy of Miss D on eBay. The price is very good (especially for the outrageously-priced large print edition) and might give you something to amuse yourself with over the next week or so as you watch it sit and sit and sit and SIT with absolutley no bids whatsoever. (And a good time was had by all.)

Meanwhile, Hopefully I will be able to blog regularly again in January (though I hesitate to suggest which year--that fear of commitment thing, an' all . . . )

This entry was posted on Wednesday, December 2, 2009 at Wednesday, December 02, 2009 and is filed under . You can follow any responses to this entry through the comments feed .

29 wise, witty and wonderful comments

I know your frustration. I can Feel It. Probably because I pretty much live it just like you do.
Off to put up my tree! (Maybe. If nothing else more important distracts me!)
:~D

December 4, 2009 at 1:04 PM

I hear you, Heids. I feel this same way often. I've just had to tell myself that I can't do it all. But regardless of whether you do it all, I'm always going to be here. I love ya, Heidi. That won't change.

December 4, 2009 at 1:08 PM

We are so alike.

This year, I've been trying to be much more moderate with blogging. Hard, but great at the same time.

Until today, when I am sick and blogging is not taboo since I am in bed.

And no worries. You can go months without blogging, and I will be thrilled to hop over here when I see your update on my reader! :)

December 4, 2009 at 1:12 PM

We all definitely know how you feel. I think everyone needs to take breaks from blogging. It shouldn't consume too much of our already busy lives.

I will always, always read you, my dear Heidi! Have a fabulous Christmas!!! xx

December 4, 2009 at 1:36 PM

You guys are breaking my heart (in a good way!)

December 4, 2009 at 1:44 PM

Ah-I still haven't done the Mormon women thing! Sorry-SUCH a flake!!

I'm glad you're getting your to-do list taken care of...maybe I shoudl try that...?

December 4, 2009 at 1:44 PM

You're totally worth waiting for. Always. And life first! Blogging second!

December 4, 2009 at 1:56 PM

You have good reasons for the blogging break. But hope you come back, you entertain me so. ;)

December 4, 2009 at 1:58 PM

I love crossing things off my to-do list. I'm glad you are getting tons done. =) I still love the blog even if you only post once in a while.

December 4, 2009 at 3:14 PM

I was stressing out over my diving hits and losing followers due to my sudden decrease in blog posts... and then I stopped looking at the numbers. I like to think of it as weeding out the fair-weather followers...

:)

December 4, 2009 at 6:05 PM

I can't believe the things I have gotten done by not blogging too! And I feel totally guilty when I post something, and people comment, and I think, "I haven't been to their blog in weeks. What a terrible friend I am." I'm still working on that guilt thing.

December 4, 2009 at 6:52 PM

Love you to pieces!

That's all.

December 4, 2009 at 7:02 PM

Heidi, you are great, and I will never stop visiting your site.
Your fans will always be there for the next installment no matter when it comes, because we love you, not what you write or don't write.
I am a true fan of Heidi Ashworth and I boldly pronounce it.
Roxanne

December 4, 2009 at 7:46 PM

Just so you know, I will still be your friend!

I know how you feel. So much to do so little time.

December 4, 2009 at 9:23 PM

I ditto all your excuses for not blogging...PLUS I wrote a book last month! Hooray for NaNoWriMo! (Except that it dropped my blog right off everybody's radar screen.)

Love to you...
I wish you sanity and serenity this Christmas.

xo

December 4, 2009 at 11:55 PM

I like how our blog breaks have coincided. It does feel nice to get things done and feel involved in your home and family more, doesn't it?

I've never had much anxiety about the blog, but I still feel happy that my number of comments differs pretty widely from post to post. Makes me feel like people don't feel obligated to comment. (Since you know that I mostly write my blog is just for me)

You've mentioned before about the community and friendships. I love that you can feel that even if you don't post for weeks upon weeks. And anyone who doesn't visit or comment maybe just isn't part of that community or friendship. You have invested a lot in presenting yourself and being a good friend to others, not just by commenting on their blogs, so you will always have many people who love and care for you, and not just loads of people who read your blog (that too, though).

December 5, 2009 at 12:08 AM

I haven't blogged in two weeks - the nice things about Google Reader and blog rolls and stuff is that they just update when the blog does, so a lot of people don't stop checking it - they just go when there's a new post. That's what I tell myself, at least. I love blogging, but there are a lot of things both more urgent and much more important than it - like bathing. And a clean house. I'm still in search of the second one, but I know I'd be a lot further behind if I got on the Internet during my prime cleaning hours (and the Internet is like giving a mouse a cookie - you can't just pop on and write a quick blog post you thought of in the shower.)

So, don't feel to bad - I still check your blog. And you not blogging makes me feel better about not blogging.

December 5, 2009 at 7:09 AM

I have been hibernating, too. Not that I don't have stuff to say, but the stuff I NEED to say I can't say, ya know? So I just don't say anything. Then I don't make blog rounds because I'm so far behind and I feel guilty. And the guilt just eats at me.

December 5, 2009 at 9:09 AM

I wonder how all of us could be feeling the same way at the same time. I really think the blog should be for you and not be about the numbers. I am trying to convince myself of that as well. Good luck with everything and like everyone else I will be waiting on the back porch any time it works for you to stop by.

December 5, 2009 at 9:10 AM

I got a bit stressed by blogging earlier in the year... I was trying to write every day (something I fell into by accident!) and I just didn't have enough time left to do other things. You'll find the right balance for you - and your audience will still be here :)

December 5, 2009 at 4:48 PM

Congrats to you for getting your priorities in order. If we only cyber connect a couple of times a month I still consider you a friend.

December 5, 2009 at 6:26 PM

Ah Heidi, you will always be loved --blogging or NOT bloggin. You'll know in your heart that "we are with ya"
Take care of yourself and your family first ----
I am sure we come in 3rd ---right??

December 5, 2009 at 8:43 PM

To try and tell you how much your blog posts, essays, and comments have helped me as an aspiring writer...there are not words.

There are a handful of amazing authored (is that a word?) LDS women bloggers and you are one of them I admire for so many reasons.

I'm grateful for your writerly advice you have shared with me. But more than that, you are you, the real deal. And I'm grateful.

December 5, 2009 at 10:29 PM

We will miss you! But I think most of us have cut down on some of the time we are on here. Too many other commitments.

December 6, 2009 at 6:09 AM

Every now and again I think it's nice to take time off. We'll all still be checking in on youuntil then. :)

December 6, 2009 at 11:32 AM

It's good to hear that your kids are gaining some weight! Now can you teach me how to cook every night for my family? I still don't like it!
BTW-you could post once a year and I would still show up to say hi! Love ya!

December 6, 2009 at 9:32 PM

I've been missing you, but I understand completely. I think about cutting back on the blogging a lot. (and I have)

Here's to crossing off to-do lists!

December 8, 2009 at 6:45 AM

Love you Heidi! We'll take you as we can get you. :)

December 9, 2009 at 8:23 AM

I love you, blog or no blog. I really get the addiction + blogging = anxiety. I'm having a hard time with it myself. I've been thinking of faking some October and November blog posts, so less people will realize what a slacker I've been. :)

December 12, 2009 at 10:05 AM

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