In Which I Reveal the Nature of My Dragon  

Posted by Heidi in

And the dragon roars as you gaze up in disbelief at the enormous gold and green and red and purple and argent-blue beast. As you watch the plumes of ash that once comprised your roof now swirling through the air in the wake of the dragon’s fiery blast, you hope and pray that what you are seeing is not a Roof Dragon. No, not that. Anything but that.

For in this land in which you live, there are many dragons. There is the Crop Dragon that burns your golden waves of grain purely for his amusement. Many people in the land have entertained a Crop Dragon at one time or another. These dragons are a terrible nuisance and, in worst case scenarios, they can cause a family to starve for lack of nourishment but they never kill outright.

Then there is the Maim Dragon. This is a terrible and dreaded dragon indeed as he strikes at random, does his worst, and is gone. Most families care for a victim of a Maim Dragon at one time or another but as terrifying as is his random destruction, his victims are as likely to recover as to die.

Not so with a Roof Dragon. His burns never heal and once he has settled on your roof, he never leaves. What’s more, he develops a taste for certain families. Indeed, if you have a roof dragon, you are a family who is forever doomed.

Nevertheless, you do what any poor soul in your position would do.

You run.

Picture courtesy of google free clipart.

This entry was posted on Thursday, May 13, 2010 at Thursday, May 13, 2010 and is filed under . You can follow any responses to this entry through the comments feed .

24 wise, witty and wonderful comments

I'm kind of hoping the roof dragon has a weakness like Smaug... I'm not sure any family deserves a roof dragon.

May 13, 2010 at 12:34 PM

Dragons suck.

May 13, 2010 at 12:44 PM

Though this is beautifully written, it is not sounding good. I hope you're ok!

May 13, 2010 at 12:58 PM

I'm with Alyson--it's very evocative and seems close to home. I hope all is well at Dunhaven Place. And that you are able to slay the dragon soon. Waiting eagerly for the next installment.

May 13, 2010 at 2:23 PM
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May 13, 2010 at 2:23 PM

I hear there are occasional roof dragons that only stay for a minute or two, wreak havoc and then leave forever. I vote that's the kind living on your roof right now.

May 13, 2010 at 2:41 PM

I want to beat that dragon up for you. =(

May 13, 2010 at 2:59 PM

I'm hoping your dragons leave soon! It doesn't sound good.

May 13, 2010 at 4:10 PM

Be gone dragon! Get thee hence!

May 13, 2010 at 4:15 PM

Can roof dragons be tamed? Exorcised?

May 13, 2010 at 5:07 PM

Roof dragons make the whole house feel heavy and dangerous. And they also discourage needed visitors from walking up to the front door. There are so many indirect things that they can/do ruin.

Now we need to come up with a good sword right through the belly...


May 13, 2010 at 5:55 PM

We run?
That would be me---as I am not brave.
BUT that is not how I see you. I see YOU standing before YOUR dragon, breast plate fastened. head sheild secured , taking a deep breath, uttering a silent prayer...then taking on YOUR dragon.
that is how I see you

May 13, 2010 at 6:10 PM

This dragon tale makes me sad.

May 13, 2010 at 11:27 PM

A Roof Dragon? Ugh. And the label you have this under is perfect. It DOES sound very romantic. I'm sorry it's not just a fairy tale.

My mom loves children's literature (she's a librarian/bibliophile) and told me this quote by G.K. Chesterton, "Fairy tales do not tell children the dragons exist. Children already know that dragons exist. Fairy tales tell children the dragons can be killed." Please believe the fairy tales!

May 14, 2010 at 12:13 AM

I hope the dragon gets slayed. I love the story, but I'm guessing the inspiration behind it is a bit fearsome!

I'm always an email away if you need me!

May 14, 2010 at 9:15 PM

I think we need a heroine to start a company that installs spikes on roofs.

May 14, 2010 at 10:43 PM

Love you Heids. That's all. I wish I could brave the dragon and fire-proof the roof for you.

May 17, 2010 at 11:48 AM

Don't leave us hanging! hope all is okay and that this particular dragon as not as bad as it seems (you know - the "Patricia C. Wrede - Enchanted Forest" type of dragons - some are okay) - please let me know that you are alright!

May 17, 2010 at 12:57 PM

I feel like I missed something important about the dragon tale. I don't get it.

It's a metaphor, huh? For what's in your head? Am I close?

I'm with Melanie. I sense a deep sadness.

LY, Miss Heidi!!!!!

May 18, 2010 at 9:23 PM

I'm with Kristina P.: Dragons suck.

And know this:
i love you, i love you, i love you, i love you, i love you, i love you, i love you, i love you, i love you, i love you, i love you, i love you, i love you, i love you, i love you, i love you, i love you, i love you, i love you, i love you, i love you, i love you, i love you, i love you, i love you, i love you.

Just so you know.

May 19, 2010 at 1:47 PM

Kazzy makes it sound as if she's familiar. This is still a mystery to me. Am I clueless? I don't know what's going on? Metaphor? HELP me HELP you :)

(I want to know)

May 20, 2010 at 10:32 AM

I think I forgot to sign in. That's me -EO Heather. :)

May 20, 2010 at 10:32 AM

Indeed! Clever, Heids. Very clever!

May 27, 2010 at 8:49 PM

Hm...working out the metaphor here. I think I'm getting it!

June 4, 2010 at 8:24 AM

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